From MUSED Magazine Online 

TUESDAY, MAY 21, 2013

socialmediarelationshipGuy meets guy.

The guys fall for each other.

The guys make it official…by putting their relationship status on Facebook. After all, it ain’t official unless it’s on Facebook, right?

Or is it?

Some time ago, I facetiously asked a friend of mine why he and his boyfriend hadn’t made their union official by announcing to the world that they were an item. His rejoinder: “I wouldn’t do that shit. Social networking sites aren’t the place for relationships.” He even went on to say that such an action could even harm a relationship.

Although our conversation was one of levity, I began to wonder if broaching your love life on social networking sites is unnecessary and whether it does, in fact, have some type of deleterious effect on the health of your relationship.


…“Bae caught me sleeping.” Instagram has become quite a popular medium for couples that want to let their followers know what was going down as they were watching the latest movie they’d picked up from the Redbox. We’ve all seen it before: couples deciding to lock lips, take a picture, throw a filter on it and share their smooch with their fellow Instagrammers. Although these are all seemingly harmless gestures, is it necessary for your followers to see what it looks like the moment before you knock boots with your boo? Will posting such a picture serve as fodder for the gossip folks, or is it at an affirmation of the strength of your relationship?


So your boyfriend just pissed you off and you need someone—or somewhere—to vent. All your friends seem to be preoccupied (read: catching up on last week’s episode of “Scandal”) and, of course, there isn’t even anything remotely entertaining on TV to take your mind off the tiff you just had with your mate. What do you do? For many, the answer is to pick up their phone and start inundating their Twitter followers’ timelines with their woeful relationship tweets. What’s the problem with this? Aside from the fact that taking your relationship problems to Twitter solves absolutely nothing, it grants your followers the opportunity to perfect their Dr. Phil impressions. In other words, many people will waste no time offering their two cents on your situation. Certainly, these aren’t the people you’d need nor want advice from—especially if they draft a majority of their tweets “from the Web.”


You just celebrated your two-year anniversary with your boo, had a weekend full of that good-good and are getting ready to embark on a weeklong vacation to commemorate the day you first met your mate. There’s only one problem: according to Facebook, you are both still single.

Should you share your relationship status on Facebook? Sure, all your closest friends know that you aren’t on the market, but should the Facebook world know? And, more importantly, if you do decide to let the masses know that you’re in a relationship, do you keep people wondering who the special someone is, or do you take the route of forthrightness and let the world know who you’re giving it up to?


It really is hard to say. Surely, not many people would espouse taking to Twitter to whine about the quarrel you just had with your partner. That’s taking it a bit too far, right? But is there really any harm in posting a picture of yourself feigning naptime just so you can let the world know you have a man? We’re already subjected to those tired “Hoes be like…” memes anyhow, so we’re numb to the pain.

Gun enthusiasts love to say that “guns don’t kill people—people do.” In the same vein, I must say that “Social networking sites don’t kill relationships—couples do.”

So go ahead, fall asleep. Oh, and make sure you let “bae” catch you in the process.

And remember, if it’s not on Facebook, it ain’t real.

This post originally appeared on MUSED Magazine Online. Republished with permission.


1 Comment

  1. I like this. I don’t think the world needs to know every detail of what you do with your bf/gf, but if you want to put your relationship status on fb it’s ok. However we don’t need to see every lip lock. And putting it on fb doesn’t define anything, as long as you both know what you have. As for it being detrimental to th e relationship, I don’t think that’s a factor. Ppl are gonna put their 2 cents in about everything other ppl do whether it’s their clothes, their job, or w/e and that happens with or without social networking


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