Here’s another instance where I read an article on MusedMagOnline.com, WHERE ARE MY STRAIGHT MALE FRIENDS? by Jared Clemons, and decided not to put it up because I have my own 2¢, well more of an answer to the question.
When I think to myself, “Where are my straight male friends?”, I look to my left… and then to my right. There are 3 men standing next to me. Mine are right here, taking this ride with me, every step of the way.
The big fella cheesin’ in his cap and gown is Shayne and in the picture next to it is Sean. I’ve known both of these guys since junior high school. The guy who looks completely overwhelmed in the last picture is aEM’s Omari Atiba, who I’ve known since high school. Also in the center picture is Kai, the last link of 4. aEM readers will know her as Ms. Truth of Sealed Kiss, but right now, this is about the fellas.
I’ve known each of them for over 10 years. I came out to all of them in 07-08. To sum up what all of them said in response in 3 words…
“I DON’T CARE.”
And not even a hair has come between the friendship that we have and maintain to this day.
The most surprising “IDC”, came from Shayne, who I’ve known the longest of the 4. Reason being, he is religious and he was the first one to answer my coming out message (via Myspace… don’t judge me. Facebook wasn’t poppin’ yet). His message was sincere and heartfelt. I can honestly say that everything he said in that message is still in effect today. This was the same from everyone, but his response was the one I feared the most. I didn’t want to lose a friend. My bro is still here.
My brothers are still here.
Not one of them thinks I want them sexually… it’s not that serious.
They encourage me to talk about my relationships and dating. I don’t have to hide what I’m doing or who I’m with. If I happen to talk about an escapade, I take it upon myself to keep it brief. I don’t want to make them uncomfortable, but they never get to that point.
And the question phase never really came. I got more questioning from my mom. Much more… messy, if I should say so (LOL).
In the end, yes, there are healthy, growing relationships between straight men and gay men. Here’s a bit of evidence for you.
TO MY BROTHERS: There’s no need for words. Our words are bond but there are no words for the immensity of our friendship.
(That goes for you too, Kai.)